THE DAY STARTED OF SKETCHY, WAITING AT PHILS HOPING THAT OUR NEW T-SHIRTS WOULD ARRIVE , WITH ABOUT 10 MINS TO SPARE ALAS THEY SHOWED UP . SO WE PACKED THE VAN AND SET OFF TO CATCH THE FERRY AT DOVER.
LD FERRIES SUCK BALLS! WE ARRIVED ON TIME AT THE FERRY PORT BUT SECURITY DECIDED TO STOP US AND FOR SOME REASON NOT CHECK OUR VAN. AFTER ALL THIS SKECTH, WE BOLTED TO THE FERRIE CHECK IN WHERE WE WERE TOLD “ SORRY YOU'VE MISSED THE FERRY, NEXT ONE IS AT SEVEN”. WE NEEDED TO BE IN BELGIUM FOR 7, SO WE HAD TO GO DOWN THE MYSTEROIOUS YET WONDERFUL LANE 81 TO BUY ANOTHER TICKET. SEA FRANCE SAVED ARE ASSES, WE RUSHED BACK TO THE CHECK IN POINT ONLY TO FIND THE MOST MISERABLE , SEX DEPRIVED WOMAN WHO THEN PROCEEDED TO CHARGE US ANOTHER £50. BUT WE GOT ON THE FERRY AND ALL WAS GOOD.
WE ARRIVED IN CALAIS AND MADE ARE WAY FOR BRUSSELS, THE DRIVE WAS BORING BUT WE ARRIVED AT THE VENUE AROUND 8.00 , MET PIERRE THE PROMOTER AND LOADED IN. THE VENUE WAS A BOAT ON THE BRUSSELS CANAL, AWESOME LITTLE VENUE. AFTER LOADING IN ME AND NICK DECIDED TO VENTURE INTO BRUSSELS TO FIND THE PERFECT SPOT FOR A WELL BUILT UP POO.
WHEN WE GOT BACK WE MET UP WITH OUR GOOD FRIENDS FROM BLACK SHEEP, WAS AWESOME TO SEE THOSE GUYS AGAIN. NICK SPENT MOST OF THE NIGHT WAVING AND BLOWING KISSES AT THE BAR MAID, DEADLY MOVES! BLACK SHEEP'S SET WAS AWESOME , WE PLAYED FOR ABOUT 50 MINS HAD AN ENCORE WHICH IS ALWAYS NICE, THE GIG WAS SICK, AWESOME SHOW TO START THIS GNARLY ADVENTURE
AFTER THE SHOW WE DROVE ABOUT 3 HRS INOT THE NIGHT, KAL HAD BROUGHT ALONG WITH HIM A TENT THAT EVEN RAY MEARS WOULD HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH. WE PITCHED UP AT A BUS STOP IN A LITTLE TOWN CALLED BEEZ, AND GOT SOME SLEEP
DAY 2 - JULY 10TH
WE WOKE UP SURROUNDED BY BELGIANPENTIONERS WAITING FOR THEIR BUS, PACKED UP OUR TENT AND HEADED FOR THE BRIGHT LIGHTS OF AUSTRIA.
OUR SAT NAV IS ABOUT AS USEFULL AS A DUCK WITH A SHOTGUN STRAPPED TO ITS BACK, THIS COMBINED WITH PHIL'S SKETCHY EUROPEAN DRIVING MADE FOR AN INTERESTING JOURNEY, SKECTHY BASTARD!
WE GOT STOPPED BY GERMAN POLIZEI WHICH ARE FUNNY, THEY DEFINITELY HAD A GOOD COP, BAD COP THING GOING ON. AFTER SCRAPING AND SNIFFING THE EARWAX LEFT ON NICK'S EARPLUG CASE THEY DECIDED THEY'D HAD ENOUGH AND LEFT US TO CONTINUE TOWARDS AUSTRIA. UNFORTUNATELY THERE WAS A HUGE ADDCIEDENT WHICH MEANT WE HAD TO TRY AND NAVIGATE OUR WAY AROUND IT. WE ENDED UP LOST IN A LITTLE VILLAGE CALLED SCHWABACH, WE FOUND TWO REALLY HOT GIRLS AT A BUS STOP WHO WERE KIND ENOUGH TO GIVE US DIRECTIONS TO THE NEAREST PUB. WE PARKED UP AND BEGAN DRINKING WITH THE LOCALS, ONE OF WHICH WAS A CRAZY NAZI WHO ASKED US IF WE WERE HIPPIES, HE WAS AN ABOUSLTE SPOON, WE MET SOME LOVELY PEOPLE THAT NIGHT , NICK'S JAW HIT THE FLOOR WHEN HE MET THE LOCAL TEASE “ANNA”, HE WAS IN COMPETION WITH EVERY GERMAN GUY IN THERE.
THIS WAS A LONG DAY BUT TURNED OUT TO BE HELL OF A NIGHT!
DAY 3 - JULY 11TH
TODAY WAS ANOTHER UBERLY LONG DAY OF DRIVING, WE WERE PLAYING A FESTIVAL JUST OUTSIDE OF VIENNA. AFTER STOPPING AT NUMEROUS SERVICE STATIONS TO BUY WEIRD CAKES, AND DRVING THROUGH SUNFLOWER FIELDS WE EVENTUALY ARRIVED AT THE FESTIVAL AND MET JURGEN THE PROMOTER. AFTER A HORRIBLE DAY OF DRIVING IT WAS OBVIOUS TONIGHT WAS GONNA BE THE NIGHT THAT WE GOT COMPLETEY BATTERED. AFTER SETTING UP OUR TENT AND LINING OUR STOMACH'S WITH POMMES, WE GOT ON THE CHILI VODKA (WHICH IS EVEN MORE DISGUSTING THAN IT SOUNDS!). THE SHOW WAS REALLY GOOD, KAL PUKED ON THE LAST CHORD OF THE SET WHICH WAS FUCKIN HILARIOUS! NEW RIOT PLAYED AFTER US WHICH GAVE US MORE TIME TO DRINK BEFORE THE AFTERSHOW PARTY.
THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE NIGHT WAS NICK CONVINCING A KID CALLED SEBASTIAN TO DO A SHOT OF JAEGER UP THE NOSE, THE KID PUKED AND ENDED UP ON THE FLOOR, IT WAS AWESOME! FANNY AND NICK DANCED LIKE MOTHERFUCKERS UNTIL 6 IN THE MORNING, FANNY COMPLETELY FELL ASS OVER TIT WHILST ROCKING BALLS TO LIMP BIZKIT, PUKING AND SLEEPING OCCURRED SHORTLY AFTER THIS!
DAY 4 - JULY 12TH
HUNGOVER AS FUCK! BEFORE WE LEFT WE “BORROWED” A CRATE OF COKE AND LEMONADE, IT WAS SO HOT WE WERE PUKING BEFORE WE EVEN GOT IN THE VAN. NICK PUKED OUT THE PASSENGER WINDOW A FEW TIMES WHILST WE WERE DRIVING THROUGH VIENNA, THEN SLEPT UNTIL 6 IN THE EVENING. BY WHICH POINT WE WERE HALF WAY BACK TO BELGIUM, PHIL HAD MANAGED NOT TO CRASH! GOOD LAD PHIL! WE PITCHED OUR TENT IN A PETROL STATION AND COOKED SOME FOOD BEFORE HITTING THE SACK, TODAY WAS PRETTY AWFUL.
DAY 5 - JULY 13TH
WE HAD OUR FIRST SHOWER IN FIVE DAYS! (7 DAYS FOR NICK, TRAMPISH BASTARD!) WE DECIDED TO DRIVE TO KOLN WHICH WAS AWESOME, THE CATHERDAL WAS BEAUTIFUL AND THE 76 H&M'S WE SAW ALL SERVED AN INDIVIDUAL PURPOSE – GOOD OLD EFFICIENT GERMAN'S! AFTER TAKING IN THE SIGHTS NICK'S CHIN STRAP WAS STARTING TO SCARE THE LOCALS, SO WE GOT BACK IN THE VAN AND HEADED FOR ECAUSINNES. AS IS OFTEN THE CASE WHEN VENTURING THROUGH BELGIUM, WE SAW MORE COWS THAN HUMANS AND ANY FRESH AIR WE DID GET IN THE VAN SMELLED LIKE SHIT. WE ARRIVED AT THE VENUE AND MET PIERRE, RUSHED TO THE BAR AND SANK AS MANY JUPILER'S AS WE COULD BEFORE WE PLAYED.
WE HAD OUR FIRST SHOWER IN FIVE DAYS! (7 DAYS FOR NICK, TRAMPISH BASTARD!) WE DECIDED TO DRIVE TO KOLN WHICH WAS AWESOME, THE CATHERDAL WAS BEAUTIFUL AND THE 76 H&M'S WE SAW ALL SERVED AN INDIVIDUAL PURPOSE – GOOD OLD EFFICIENT GERMAN'S! AFTER TAKING IN THE SIGHTS NICK'S CHIN STRAP WAS STARTING TO SCARE THE LOCALS, SO WE GOT BACK IN THE VAN AND HEADED FOR ECAUSINNES. AS IS OFTEN THE CASE WHEN VENTURING THROUGH BELGIUM, WE SAW MORE COWS THAN HUMANS AND ANY FRESH AIR WE DID GET IN THE VAN SMELLED LIKE SHIT. WE ARRIVED AT THE VENUE AND MET PIERRE, RUSHED TO THE BAR AND SANK AS MANY JUPILER'S AS WE COULD BEFORE WE PLAYED.
WE THEN DROVE TO PIERRE’'S AND HAD SOME AMNESIA, AFTER SOME MINOR HEART PROMBLEMS, MIND RACING AND GENERAL SKECTKING WE ALL SLIPPED INTO A TEN HOUR COMA.
DAY 6 - JULY 14TH
LEIDEN TODAY, SHOULD BE FUN .SHOWS IN HOLLAND ALWAYS SEEM TO BE AWESOME. THE VENUE WAS A SQUAT CALLED SUB071 , IT WAS A SICK BUILDING, THE PROMOTER LEON WAS WICKED, COOKED US SOME AMAZING VEGAN PIZZA AND WHOLESOME SOUP. THE VENUE WAS SO COOL, IT WAS BY FAR THE SMALLEST PLACE WE'VE PLAYED (30 CAPACITY) BUT WE KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE A FUN SHOW.
LEIDEN TODAY, SHOULD BE FUN .SHOWS IN HOLLAND ALWAYS SEEM TO BE AWESOME. THE VENUE WAS A SQUAT CALLED SUB071 , IT WAS A SICK BUILDING, THE PROMOTER LEON WAS WICKED, COOKED US SOME AMAZING VEGAN PIZZA AND WHOLESOME SOUP. THE VENUE WAS SO COOL, IT WAS BY FAR THE SMALLEST PLACE WE'VE PLAYED (30 CAPACITY) BUT WE KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE A FUN SHOW.
AFTER TALKING TO EVERYONE AND MEETING THE DUCTH SNOOP DOG, WE DECIDED TO VENTURE TO AMSTERDAM, WE ARRIVED IN THE DAM ABOUT 1.30 am, WE THEN BUMPED INTO A DUDE WHO LOOKED A FRUIT BAT, CRAZY AND STRANGE BUT A LOVELY GUY HE SOLD US SOME OF THE LOCAL FRUIT AND WE HEADED BACK TO THE VAN FOR ANOTHER DOSE OF AWESOME HEART PALPITATIONS, SOME WEIRD THOUGHTS AND A SPRINKLE OF SKECTHING , WE FELL INTO A MELLOW SLUMPER AND ALL DRIFTED OF TO SLEEP.
DAY 7 - JULY 15TH
GOT THE TRAM TO THE CENTER OF AMSTERDAM, AS SOON AS WE ARRIVED WE DECIDED TO WAKE AND BAKE, TODAY WAS GONNA BE AN ABOUSLTE MEMORY WIPER SO THIS PART OF THE TOUR DIARY MIGHT NOT BE AS DESRCIPTIVE AS ABOVE. AFTER GOING TOO THE 420 WE GOT SOME FOOD, THEN WENT FOR A WALK , BACK TOO THE 420, HAVE A DRINK, SKETCH OUT, ASK HARRISON IF HE'S OK, HAVE THE 7th POO OF THE DAY, EAT LOADS OF BREAD, BK TO THE 420, DRINK, DRY MOUTH, SKECTHING, WALK FOR AGES, LOOK AT SOME CRAZY POSTCARDS, ONE IN PATRICLUAR WAS ABOSULTY RANK , MIND YOU MOST OF THEM WERE SICK, ESPECIALLY THE EYE VAJINA EYE!!
AFTER THE DAM WE JUST SAT CHILLING BY A SMALL CANAL RIVER THING, COOKING SOME SOUP AND NOODLES , THE MAJORITY OF US ARE STARTING TO RUN OUT OF MONEY!
TODAY HAS BEEN WELL GOOD FUN AND A BRILLIANT WAY TO SPEND OUR DAY OFF, UNTIL TOMORROW..........
DAY 8 - JULY 16TH
JUST CLEANED THE OLD TEETH WHICH WAS A HUGE SUCCESS, AND A NICE CHANGE FROM THE CHRONIC DRY MOUTH, THE VAN HUMS AND THEY FLYS ARE LOVING IT. TODAY WE HAVE A 4 HOUR DRIVE TO HAMBURG AND PHIL LOOKS EXTREMELY KNACKERED THIS MORING. HARRISON'S SKETCHY CHIN STRAP IS TAKING OVER HIS FACE AND CHEST AND HIS NECK HAIR HAS JOINED HIS BEARD AS WELL, MORE THE MERRIER! SO WE SET OF DRIVING TO HAMBURG, TOOK AROUND 6 HOURS AND ALL OF US WERE DEFINITELY FEELING IT TODAY. WE FOUND THE VENUE, IT WAS AN INCREDIBLE PLACE AND THEY HAD A SKATEPARK BEHIND THE VENUE.
JUST CLEANED THE OLD TEETH WHICH WAS A HUGE SUCCESS, AND A NICE CHANGE FROM THE CHRONIC DRY MOUTH, THE VAN HUMS AND THEY FLYS ARE LOVING IT. TODAY WE HAVE A 4 HOUR DRIVE TO HAMBURG AND PHIL LOOKS EXTREMELY KNACKERED THIS MORING. HARRISON'S SKETCHY CHIN STRAP IS TAKING OVER HIS FACE AND CHEST AND HIS NECK HAIR HAS JOINED HIS BEARD AS WELL, MORE THE MERRIER! SO WE SET OF DRIVING TO HAMBURG, TOOK AROUND 6 HOURS AND ALL OF US WERE DEFINITELY FEELING IT TODAY. WE FOUND THE VENUE, IT WAS AN INCREDIBLE PLACE AND THEY HAD A SKATEPARK BEHIND THE VENUE.
AFTER WAITING FOR 3 HOURS FOR THIS FAT GERMAN LADY TO MOVE HER BLUE VAN , WE UNLOADED INTO THE VENUE. THE PROMOTERS COOKED US THE BEST FOOD, IT WAS AMAZING, WE HAD VEGAN FRANKFURTERS , VEGAN SALAMI, CRISPS, CHOCLATE , HOT CURRY WITH WINE, AND AS MUCH LOCAL BEER AS WE COULD DRINK. AFTER STUFFING OURSELVES WE HEADED UPSTAIRS TO WACTH THE BANDS, SHELLYCOAT OPENED THE SHOW AND WERE FOLLOWED BY VLADIMIR HARKONEN, BOTH WERE AWESOME.
THIS WAS DEFINITELY THE STRANGEST SHOW OF THE TOUR, WE WERE JOINED ON STAGE (FOR THE WHOLE SET) BY A GNARLY LOOKING LOCAL BUM. HE PROCEED TO STEAL KAL'S MICROPHONE AND SCREAM OVER THE FIRST SONG OF OUR SET, AT FIRST WE FOUND IT HILLARIOUS BUT AFTER SIX SONGS IT BECAME ANNOYING AS FUCK! AFTER HAVING HIS MICROPHONE TAKEN THE MAN DECIDED TO HEADBUTT HARRISON AND JUST GENRALLY HIT ANYTHING HE COULD WHILST GURNING LIKE A MAD MAN. HE EVEN CAME BACK ON STAGE FOR THE ENCORE – PSYCHO!
THIS WAS DEFINITELY THE STRANGEST SHOW OF THE TOUR, WE WERE JOINED ON STAGE (FOR THE WHOLE SET) BY A GNARLY LOOKING LOCAL BUM. HE PROCEED TO STEAL KAL'S MICROPHONE AND SCREAM OVER THE FIRST SONG OF OUR SET, AT FIRST WE FOUND IT HILLARIOUS BUT AFTER SIX SONGS IT BECAME ANNOYING AS FUCK! AFTER HAVING HIS MICROPHONE TAKEN THE MAN DECIDED TO HEADBUTT HARRISON AND JUST GENRALLY HIT ANYTHING HE COULD WHILST GURNING LIKE A MAD MAN. HE EVEN CAME BACK ON STAGE FOR THE ENCORE – PSYCHO!
AFTER THE SHOW WE MADE OUR WAY TO AUSTRIA AS WE HAD A DAY OFFANDWANTED TO CATCH RENTOKILL AND PROPAGANDHI IN WIEN!
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